Just to be clear about the Christmas comments in my earlier post, which I am having trouble doing, I wasn’t trying to make it all about the loot. I like giving things. I can’t help it. It isn’t about what I get. Mostly it’s about getting together with family and friends.
Every year we all agree not to spend too much, and we don’t. Because of my current circumstances, I was expecting it to be even less this year. It was, but not as much less as I expected. I gave little and I expected little. My family was generous and essentially gave me things that I needed (books are a necessity). I didn’t expect that – well, yeah, I did, but I was hoping that it would be even more toned down than it was.
I felt guilty, and embarrassed.
I can’t afford to give much. I can’t afford to give anything. Like I said, I couldn’t afford to give to charity last year. It hurts to admit all of this and that’s probably why I can’t get the words quite right.
I’m babbling. I guess I still need to let this marinate in my brain a little longer.
2 comments:
I don't care if you never buy me a present, but you should post comments on my blog. And get on Facebook - that is actually work-oriented - you practice wasting time while at a job. :)
Well, I should buy you a present, but you are right. I have not been commenting much of anywhere lately, and while I did sign up on Facebook, I haven't done anything there yet.
I hadn't fully appreciated how that would help with job skills. I like the way you think.
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