A little background detail

Well, I've decided to go with the abbreviated version. Yeah, this is the shorter version. There is a lot that could be said, but I want people to read this, not run away from TMI overload. I am doing this partly for selfish reasons, but it is in part for others. I wanted to tell my story in the event that it may do me some good. I also wanted to put it out there for other people to find because it helped me to read similar stories when I was first looking for info about what had happened to me.

The short version:
In 2005 I got Legionnaires’ Disease, ARDS (Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome), sepsis, suffered multiple organ failure (I was on dialysis for 3 - 4 weeks, my heart stopped, that sort of thing), and I spent two months in the hospital – most of the time in the ICU, sedated, on paralytics and intubated on a ventilator. Now I have scarred lungs, COPD, asthma, muscle weakness, nerve damage, problems related to brain injury and PTSD. It's just shy of three years and I am still trying to recover from the after-effects of the diseases and also the damage caused by the treatment. No complaints, just the truth; sometimes when they save your life they do some damage.

Just saying some of those things about myself is hard. This is, in many ways, still unreal to me. That's part of what I'm doing with this blog: trying to make it more real.

Now, I am not a doctor, so take nothing I say as medical advice.

I repeat: this is not medical advice. It's a personal blog.

I am offering my personal experience and hopefully encouragement. These types of illnesses are things that most people never hear of. I certainly didn't know about ARDS until I woke up in the hospital and my wife told me about it. You can feel as if you're the only one who has ever gone through this and feel isolated. That doesn't mean that there aren't thousands of other people out there who have shared the experience. It's hard when you can't find a doctor who can help you because many doctors never see patients like us. I just want to say to anyone looking for information that you're not alone. I may not be the best source of info, so search online. I'll do what I can.

I'm just lucky to be alive. I know that when you wake up to find yourself disabled it isn't easy to see the good in it all. You're life gets turned upside down and it's all out of your control. The simple things of daily life can be a challenge, but I’m alive. Right now I'm trying to rebuild my life and recognize what I still have. You can lose a lot to disease; ARDS especially can take so much from you. I realize that there are others much worse off than I am. I am not the person that I was, but I haven't lost everything. It's hard for me to accept the very things that I am saying, but that's what I need to do.

I am further along with that now - so far I'm still recapping and trying to tell other people that there are others out there like them.


To be continued.